I LOVE コイキング
I LOVE Koiking
I LOVE Magikarp

Official Magikarp song:

Took some liberties to use English terms, even though “haneru” is more literally “to flap around”, the English use of the move in the games is Splash.
Although the original lyrics have a lot of rhymes (with -ingu endings) / puns (koi = fish, but also koi = love) that don’t translate into English, or I just haven’t thought of a clever to get them to work, but that’s how it is between languages.~
*edit* 5/12/17: Official English version is up: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H3x3-22Gi3g

Kanji:
たよりなくて　なさけない
とても有名　弱すぎて

昔はとても　強かった？　そんなウワサも　あるけれど
今はとっても　弱いんだ　悲しいくらいに　弱いんだ

弱いポケモン　コイキング　世界でいちばん　弱いやつ
弱いポケモン　コイキング　あまりの弱さ　ショッキング

とにかくはねる　よくはねる
はねるだけで　山こえる

どうしてはねる　意味なくはねる　バトルでははねる　なにもない
調子に乗って　はねつづけ　時にビジョンに　つかまるよ

はねるポケモン　コイキング　世界でいちばん　はねるやつ
はねるポケモン　コイキング　いつもピタピタ　ジャンピング

どんな場所でも　まずつれる
ボロのつりざおで　つれすぎる

海　川　よごれた水たまり　どんな水でも　スイミング
ゆるい川でも　流される　どこかにできてる　コイダマリ

つれたと思ったら　コイキング　キャッチアンドリリース？　しちゃうすぐ？
つれたと思ったら　コイキング　キャッチアンドイート？　ナンセンス！

キンピカごうか　色ちがい
ぜんぜん中身　変わらない

ギャラドス進化で　めちゃ強い　そこまで待つの　めちゃつらい
おやじが売ってた　５００円！　返品できない　ハプニング！

ざんねんなポケモン　コイキング　人にあげても　ブーイング
ざんねんなポケモン　コイキング　気にしたことない　ランキング

ボクのポケモン　コイキング　ボクはそのまま　育てるよ
ボクのポケモン　コイキング　６びきそろえて　ファイティング

みんな恋する　コイキング　世界でいちばん　好きなやつ
恋に恋する　コイキング　キミにささげる　ラブソング

Romaji:

tayorinakute nasakenai
totemo yuumei yowasugite

mukashi wa totemo tsuyokatta? sonna UWASA mo aru keredo
ima wa tottemo yowainda kanashii kurai ni yowain da

yowai POKEMON KOIKINGU sekai de ichiban yowai yatsu
yowai POKEMON KOIKINGU amari no yowasa SHOKKINGU

tonikaku haneru yoku haneru
haneru dake de yama koeru

doushite haneru imi naku haneru BATORU de hanetemo nani mo nai
choushi ni notte hane tsuzuke toki ni PIJON ni tsukamaru yo

haneru POKEMON KOIKINGU sekai de ichiban haneru yatsu
haneru POKEMON KOIKINGU itsumo PITAPITA JANPINGU

donna basho demo mazu tsureru
BORO no tsurizao de tsure sugiru

umi kawa yogoreta mizutamari donna sui demo SUIMINGU
yurui kawa demo nagasareru doko ka ni dekiteru KOIDAMARI

tsureta to omottara KOIKINGU KYACCHI ANDO RIRIISU? shichau sugu?
tsureta to omottara KOIKINGU KYACCHI ANDO IITO? NANSENSU!

KINPIKA gouka irochigai
zenzen nakami kawaranai

GYARADOSU shinka mecha tsuyoi soko made matsu no mecha tsurai
oyaji ga utteta gobyaku en! henpin dekinai HAPUNINGU!

zannen POKEMON KOIKINGU hito ni agetemo BUUINGU
zannen POKEMON KOIKINGU kinishita koto nai RANKINGU

BOKU no POKEMON KOIKINGU BOKU wa sono mama sodateru yo
BOKU no POKEMON KOIKINGU roppiki soroete FAITINGU

minna koisuru KOIKINGU sekai de ichiban suki na yatsu
koi ni koisuru KOIKINGU KIMI ni sasageru RABUSONGU

Translation:
Unreliable, pathetic
So very famous for being too weak

There are rumors that it once used to be really strong?
But it’s super weak now, so weak that it’s sad

Weak Pokemon Magikarp, the number one weakest in the world
Weak Pokemon Magikarp, it’s so weak it’s shocking

It splashes for starters, it splashes a lot
Just by splashing, it overcomes mountains

Why does it splash? It splashes without reason, even splashing in battle does nothing
If it gets cocky and keeps splashing, sometimes a Pidgeotto will catch it

Splashing Pokemon Magikarp, the number one splasher in the world
Splashing Pokemon Magikarp, it’s always flapping about, jumping

Anywhere you go, it’s the first thing you catch
With an old rod, you’ll catch too many

Oceans, rivers, dirty puddles, you’ll find it in all bodies of water, swimming
Even in serene rivers, they get carried away, you’ll find pools of them anywhere

Think you’ve caught something but it’s a Magikarp, catch and release? Do it soon?
Think you’ve caught something but it’s a Magikarp, catch and eat? Nonsense!

Shining gold, a shiny one
On the inside, it’s no different from any other

It gets super strong when it evolves into Gyarados, waiting for that to happen is super painful
An old man is selling them for 500 yen! No refunds, that happens!

Unfortunate Pokemon Magikarp, even if you give it to someone, you get a booing
Unfortunate Pokemon Magikarp, it’s never worried about its ranking

My Pokemon Magikarp, I’ll raise it as it is
My Pokemon Magikarp, I’ll get 6 of them and get them fighting

The one everyone loves, Magikarp, the most beloved in the world
In love with love, Magikarp, this is a love song for you

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